Description

In this third episode in the Mentoring Intelligence Series, Phil shares what he believes is the main barrier to leaders mentoring others. It is not the lack of a particular skill or strategy, but rather a heart issue of what biblical leadership is all about. Without the attitude of Christ, that of a servant, it will be virtually impossible or at least very unlikely that someone will be a mentor to someone else.

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Video Script

Episode 3 Intro: The Major Barrier to Mentoring

From my experience there is one major barrier that hinders leaders from mentoring others and creating a culture of mentoring within their church or organization.  You might be surprised to discover that this is not really due to a lack of a particular skill or even a strategy failure. No, this is much deeper and really cuts to the heart of the matter of what biblical leadership is and who we are…..it is a matter of heart. Without this it is virtually impossible to mentor others as Jesus did.

Jesus’ Counter-Cultural Model

Last time we discussed a couple key barriers to developing a mentoring lifestyle in our leadership and ministry. However to really make a change in our priorities and focus requires a deep transformation of our hearts and not just a bit of tinkering around the edges.

As we have been learning, Jesus’ type of leadership was very counter cultural, both in his time and in the 2000 years since. I have lived in both Africa and Eastern Europe and have had the privilege to be with leaders from Eurasia to Latin America…. And I have yet to find a culture that values Jesus type of leadership. In all of our cultures, our tendency is to use power to serve ourselves and our own interests, rather than others. I think it’s just part of our fallen human condition.

All Cultures Impacted by the Fall

It is an inescapable reality that all of human cultures and institutes have been affected by Sin and the Fall. No exceptions. So, without transformation, even our religious and church institutions are impacted  by the same virus. If we as leaders are not intentional to have our hearts and minds renewed in terms of our leadership style, just as our life needs to be renewed, it’s very likely that our carnal self will take over. I know that is not great news for some.

But once we become followers of Jesus he begins to change us in every area to be more like him. As Rom. 12: 1-2 teaches, we need to have our minds renewed so we not conform to the patterns of the world. As leaders in the Body we are not exempt or above this process. Preaching and teaching others does not mean we do not need to have the Word change our sinner’s heart.

And this must also include our understanding and application of biblical leadership. Each of our cultures have been impacted by the Fall and so they all have a misguided understanding of what the real purpose of leadership is. Instead of a servant leadership approach that lays down its life and serves others for their better-meant, in our fallenness we tend to be are competitive, driven my our selfish motives and ego.

Heart Transformation Required

So if this heart transformation does not take place, even us leaders within Christian organizations will model the values and principles of leadership taken from the fallen culture around us. Though we may be growing and maturing in some areas of our life, without a heart change in this area our leadership will not look much different than the institutions in the fallen societies us.

In our discussion here, I would like to link this transformation of our leadership directly to the topic of mentoring. As I have interacted with thousands of leaders, it has been my experience that without a renewed leadership model that is based on Jesus’ model, it’s really tough to come alongside of others in a mentoring relationship. What do I mean?

What Does Servant Leadership Look Like?

Well to begin with, let’s review what we mean by Jesus’ model of leadership. This does not mean that we have no real vision or direction or that we have no boundaries in our lives and ministry. I think we all would agree that Jesus was the greatest leader of all time — and you might believe a lot of things about Jesus — but being weak and a wimp is not one that comes to mind. Jesus arrive on the scene 2000 years ago and displayed a bottom up leadership that was focussed on serving others, it was not about him using power and position to gain advantage for himself.  And let’s remember who he was…..he WAS the Son of God, he had some serious weight he could have thrown around. But he never did.

The classic illustration of what this new leadership was to look like was Jesus stooping down and washing the feet of his disciples — something only a lowly servant would have done in that culture. He was the Messiah, yet he was showing his disciples what biblical leadership really looked like. Of course it was a pretty tough sell in that culture. The disciples were much like us, they had been affected their whole life by the societal structures around them.

Have you ever thought of what it would have been like to be one of the 12 disciples? I don’t know about you, but I think I would have been happy to just be one of the twelve….I mean I probably would have been happy to be one of the 70 or even 500, to be honest……but one of the twelve, are you kidding me!?

And I am sure that was the case for them in the beginning. At times they probably looked at each other and thought….okay there are twelve of us, there’s twelve tribes of Israel, I might not be a math genius but when Jesus began talking about the Kingdome, they could see how the numbers were lining up.

They knew enough of the Torah, including the prophets, to figure out what that meant. “We are the guys!” We are going to be right there with Jesus. Let’s just say there were positioned pretty good. But there was a little problem. Their idea of being a kingdom leader was completely contrary to Jesus’.  And you don’t have to be a Bible scholar to notice that they really struggled to see the Kingdom through a lens that was not clouded by their culture. So Jesus has to do some remedial leadership training and quick….after all, he only has three years.

Timeless Problem: Who is the Greatest?

So in Matt. 18 we get an indication of what was really going on among the disciples in the conversations that the Bible doesn’t always record. Very quickly they were no longer content to be just one of the twelve! Instead, while they were walking and talking on those dusty roads, they were arguing about which of them was going to be the greatest in the Kingdom. Of course, once Jesus asks what they were talking about, it gets pretty quiet. So Jesus brings a child close to him says You guys want to be great in my Kingdom? Become like little children. And remember children in that culture were basically one step above the family pet, a bit beyond be heart and not seen …not exactly the centre of their parent’s universe as today. I am not saying that is a good thing, but just the way it was.

Well it seems that this went right over their heads. Why do I say that? Well not long afterwards,  in Matt. 20 James and John recruit their mother to see if she can talk some sense into Jesus. They were pretty young themselves, but surely a good Jewish mother Jesus could not refuse.

She wasn’t asking much, right? Just  let my good Jewish boys sit on your left or right – after all they are already part of the special elite force of twelve, so what’s the problem? Ya, didn’t go over to well with the other 10 did it?. Jesus lets them know that this isn’t going to happen and then says something which indicates that they were operating from worldly, not kingdom principles:  “You know how the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them and their high officials exercise authority of them …(at this point of course they are nodding yes yes….they know all about that….) But then Jesus lowers the boom… “With you it should not be so!”

Kingdom Leadership Values – Walking the Walk

The obvious question for the reader today is, “Is it so with our leadership?” Now we are more sophisticated and are really good at putting spiritual sounding titles on our positions…..you know pastor, evangelist, maybe even apostle or bishop if you are really spiritual. But do we function much different than in the institutions around us?

Jesus continues, “You want to be great in the Kingdom, you must become a servant” ….and it gets worse, “and whoever wants to be first must be your slave.” And then the real clincher, to follow his example: “Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” They couldn’t argue with that, for he has been serving them. He walked the walk.

From other scripture we know that the unspoken question that was left hanging in the air was, “If I, your master Jesus,  have this attitude, what kind of attitude should you being a mere mortal have? Yes, I know, even though you are one of only 12.”

Now it would be nice to report that by the end of Jesus ministry and life they got it. They heard the teaching, got the notes, and even saw the video in living color. But unfortunately that was not the case. Let’s go back to the last supper when Jesus was washing their feet. Right after the meal….I mean they were probably still using a toothpick to get the last of the unleaven bread out of their teeth – I am sure the towel was not even dry yet! But here they are arguing again over who was the greatest among them (Luke 22:24). I have a sneaking suspicion that there were a few other occasions this happened than the ones that are officially recorded for us in Scripture.

Old habits and cultures die hard, don’t they. Jesus knew it was going to take his death and resurrection to provide them with the spiritual insight and power to have their minds transformed. They would get it eventually, but it was not going to be easy. And they actually were with Jesus in person….he actually washed their feet….in person. I am thinking if I would have been one of them, that would have been enough for me. But, maybe not.

Kingdom Leadership: Still a Struggle Today

After all I am living in the post-resurrection era, have much more of the New Covenant revelation in the form of the New Testament, and I still struggle with this basic kingdom principle when it comes to this upside down type of leadership.  Paul writes in Phil 2 that “in your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather he made himself nothing by taking on the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.”

Pretty heavy stuff. Kingdom leadership looks a lot like a cross, not a crown. Or in more modern speech, laying down our own desires and serving others, rather than striving for position, power and prestige. Sometimes kind of makes you want to rethink being a leader in the Kingdom eh?!

And this is at the core of the problem. The relationships in the Body of Christ – including those called to equip others – are to be completely different. We are not the experts telling others what to do. There is only one Head, and we are not Him! We are just part of the body and the Word must change us as we preach it is to change others. We are not at a different level than the rest of the Body.

The Problem of Position and Title

Very soon after the first century, and ever since then, fallen human nature took over, even in the church. Some  Scripture passages were wrongly used to rationalize a hierarchal leadership structure in the Church, which of course violates Jesus basic teaching. In Matt. 23 Jesus makes it pretty clear. Jesus is teaching about the religious folks, teachers of the law, you know pastors, priests, professors. He is nailing them pretty hard and saying that for them it’s all about outward show, you know, they loved titles, position and others deferring  to them, even special parking spaces for their donkey. I mean they had it all. Does it sound rather familiar?

When Jesus makes the application, he really lowers the hammer, “But you are not to be called “Rabbi” or teacher for you have one Teacher, and you are all brothers. And do not call anyone on earth “father’ for you have one Father and he is in heaven. Nor are you to be called instructors, for you have one Instructor, the Messiah. The greatest among you will be your servant. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” Ya I know would sure be more convenient if that wasn’t include in the Bible wouldn’t it?

We won’t have time now, but in the next episode I want to spend more time dealing with the obvious question that arises….how about authority in the Church? Are not pastors and church leaders to have a position over others, so all things are done decently and in order? And didn’t Paul also say he was spiritual father to Timothy? So is he contradicting Jesus? These are all good questions and we’ll around to them, but for now let’s circle back here to servant leadership as Jesus taught and illustrated in his life.

Relationships in Body of Christ Very Different

The obvious and main point we see Jesus teaching his disciples in the Gospels is that the attitude of the culture around them in relation to leadership was completely opposite of the values and practises of his kingdom.  There are many implications of this for us today, the main one being that having the heart and attitude of a servant is actually a prerequisite for all Kingdom relationships, including leadership within the Body of Christ.

As Paul writes in Ephesians 5:21, relationships in the body are to be mutually submissive….this applies to leadership in the church. Pastors and church leaders have a function to equip the saints, but this does not make them above those they serve. It is often people who want to put leadership on a pedestal and we must be the ones to humble ourselves and step off the podium and crawl back on to the cross.  We are all, regardless of our function, just equal members of the Body.

Mentoring Impossible without Servanthood Attitude

So how does this apply to mentoring? Without this attitude, it is virtually impossible to really mentor others. Now, we can control and manipulate others, but not equip and release them. After all, if I think I am number one or at least God’s man of power for this very hour, why would I stoop to put others ahead of myself? I think that is exactly what the early disciples were wrestling with. Not much has changed. My experience has been that if we are honest we all love power, position, titles, private parking stalls, business class (okay that one hurts) and this works counter to laying down our lives for others rather than building our own ministry….or should I say maybe even our own kingdom.

Those who feel they are indispensible to God’s plans, would consider it a huge waste of time to slow down long enough to invest in others, there is so little time and so many more important things to accomplish for the Lord. In a later episode we are going to discover how a gifted, called younger Apostle Paul  needed to adjust his mindset by the end of his life.

We see from Jesus’ life that this approach is the only type of leadership that reproduces life in others. Power based leadership produces awe and spiritual dependence, rather than developing and releasing others. And it actually isolates leaders and makes them causalities of unrealistic expectations. If we do not have this Kingdom  leadership DNA that Jesus modeled, at best we will reproduce stillborn leaders – leaders who cannot reproduce others. Kind of the opposite of what it takes to mentor someone.

Next time we are going to dig a bit deeper by looking at some examples from Scripture and address the thorny issue of how can there be equality and varying degrees of authority in the body of Christ all at the same time. To do that we will have to deal with the difference between power and authority from a Kingdom perspective.  As always, I hope you’ll join me.

Some Leadership Matters to Consider

But before then, I’d like to leave you a few leadership matters to consider:

How has the culture around you impacted your own leadership values and style?

Looking at Jesus’ teaching again, have you discovered any new insights?

And finally, are you open to allowing the Lord to radically change your leadership values to that of a servant?